Friday, November 21, 2008

He's no Michael Phelps.

The boy just finished his second session of swimming lessons. He didn't pass. He passed the first one, but I could tell right from the start that this one was not going to go the same way. This one required some actual swimming out of the kid. He listens really well and apparently can blow bubbles like none other, but swimming...not so much. He really hates going under water, putting his whole face in the water or laying on his back. He freezes up. The boy is not a scared type of kid. But for whatever reason being on his back in the water is horrible for him. Even with a life jacket on, he was so tense he could barely move. I am not sure if it is a sensory issue, because he has some serious issues with slimy things on him. Sticky fingers, lotion, finger painting that type of thing. So I am not sure if the water around his face just gives him the willies or if this is his one fear. He can climb up to the top of the climbing wall at our gym, while in no way coordinated in tee ball he never really fussed, he loved soccer and he doesn't ever complain in the water, he just can barely move. He says that he really likes swimming lessons and even jumped off the diving board with a life jacket on. I plan on continuing the lessons simply because it is a safety issue. At the grandma's house there are ponds which are really deep and unsettling for me and a jacuzzi that is always locked when we are there, but when the boy realized what it was he declared "that's a giant bathtub!" So neurotic me will keep him in swim lessons! But somehow I think my dream of him being an Olympic swimmer just went down the drain (it came about because the boy's body build is very similar to Mr. Phelps, just without the muscles). The husband has moved on and decided that hockey is the new sport of choice given the boy's penchant for "accidentally" knocking other kids down, not to mention his size. Now he just needs to learn how to skate...

Thursday, November 20, 2008

nothing really

Meet Cava. This is the pug we are watching off and on until February. She reminds me of the talking pug in the movie Men in Black. I am pretty sure she won't be here the week I give birth and I am not sure about after because while I am mostly mellow now, I am anything but mellow when I am post partum. I am neurotic and tired and extremely forgetful. Which results in comments like: when was the last time we fed the dog and cat, two days ago? Actually, has anyone seen them today? Poor pets. The husband is planning on taking some time off to help since I won't be able to drive for 10 days but the last thing I want to do is starve someone else's pet.

In other news, here are some much anticipated updates I am sure:

1. I found the big fat underwear. I went looking under the dresser to say hello to the dust bunnies and saw something poking out that was stuck in between the dresser and the wall. Low and behold it was the granny pants. The next day I went to put them on and saw how incredibly huge they were and stated "there is no way these will fit my nice firm buttocks...oh, look they do rather well actually." humbling.

2. I received a call from the nanny agency that the crazy babysitter who I found sleeping in my bed was fired. I kind of feel bad because now there is a person unemployed, but perhaps she was simply in the wrong line of work.

3. I am learning Chinese and boy oh boy is it interesting. They don't conjugate verbs, which is just awesome. But they use all these "classifier words" when speaking that make no sense to me and I am pretty sure they are there for the noise they make. And don't get me started on the characters. This is going to be a long process. Like most languages I can hear and understand way better than I speak.

4. The boy has moved on from race cars to airplanes. His favorite is the SR-71 Blackbird fastest plane in the world. Which is exactly how he says it over and over. He wants a SR-71 Blackbird fastest plane in the world birthday cake next month and a SR-71 Blackbird fastest plane in the world toy. I am not sure how easy the toy is going to be to find since the plane has been decommissioned since 1998. He did get to see one while at the Manny's basic training graduation so I planning on having a picture of him and the plane scanned onto the cake. I guess there is always e-bay for the toy.

5. We actually had a birthday party for the dog. I am not a fan of doggy birthday parties but she was turning 10 and the kids were so into it so we got her a toy and some dog cookies and cupcakes. I don't really dress up my pets either unless I am feeling diabolical and want to torture them or if I am making a Christmas card. So Maddy was allowed to sit at the table and eat a cup cake. The very idea that she was being allowed to sit at the table with the humans was just too much for her. Any other day she will climb up the table to look for food, but because she was allowed to sit there she acted like she was going to get in trouble. She couldn't even eat her cupcake. So after telling her it was ok and then laughing rudely at her we put the cupcake on the floor and she ate it in one bite. Dogs.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

about a beer and burger

After baby girl threw up unexpectedly at the precise moment we walked through the door of a restaurant it was decided that I would take the boy to see one very cool ski film. My justification was that I am missing an entire ski season so the least I could do was watch a movie. The husband thankfully agreed. Possibly not realizing that he was missing his chance at an alcoholic beverage with adults. I am pretty sure this thought came to rest in his brain the next day while entering Costco. As I have said the before the husband loves Costco, but it seems as though his tail has stopped wagging about shopping there with the family. It is possible he realized shopping with two kids is downright horrible at times. I am no help in the matter. The boy and I ran off to taste all the free samples while the very NOT sick 24 hours later baby girl and the husband picked out large boxed items. He became quite surly actually.

After returning home with said boxes the husband and the boy played tee ball in the backyard and then watched football while I simple cleaned the kitchen and then retreated to my bed to play solitaire on the iphone. (A horribly addictive little application that I should really just delete.) Because I needed to rest after all that food tasting and Costco wandering, you see. Baby girl napped. Over the past few weeks we have gotten into the routine in which the husband cooks the Sunday dinner. Usually large and very messy. But hey I will take all the help I can get. We were supposed to grill out steaks last Sunday but seeing as how he was surly from missing a ski movie and quite possibly an alcoholic beverage at some tasty restaurant he declared that we were to go to Red Robin (yum!) for dinner. Why? Because he had just seen a commercial for their new hamburger and he just had to try it.

Whatever. I'll go out to eat usually without a fuss. Once there I quickly realized that the gears in the husband's brain had been turning during the football watching. It may have gone something like this:

1. Football is good.
2. Beer is good.
3. Football and beer together are really good.
4. I don't want to drive to the liquor store.
5. Jennie will be annoyed if I get up to go buy beer.
6. How to buy beer and not annoy Jennie. Think. Think.
7. Ah ha! Restaurants have beer.
8. What restaurants have beer and football?
9. Sports bars. Can't take kids to sports bars that will annoy Jennie.
10. Hey look a new hamburger at Red Robin. It has fried jalapenos on it.
11. Fried jalapenos are bar food.
12. Red Robin has beer.
13. Red Robin has t.v.s
14. Red Robin will NOT annoy Jennie.
15. Problem solved! I will take the family to Red Robin, drink beer, eat a ridiculously spicy burger, and watch football on their t.v.s
16. Now I am happy.

So the once surly husband enjoyed his two beers, the Cowboys/Redskin game, and The New Burning Love Burger which has fried jalapenos on it, plus cayenne pepper and from the way he was acting a lot of other spicy stuff. Mr. Texas was all, "I can eat the whole thing it's not going to get the best of me." It did. He managed *maybe* half. But he was successful in his quest for beer and football, he got both and seeing as how I was stuffing my face full of fries and a salad, because I don't want to gain too much weight you know, I wasn't annoyed.

Monday, November 17, 2008

oh dear fetus of mine

While being pregnant with boy child a good five years ago I loved it when he moved. Loved it! He was huge and at the end it must have been pretty difficult for him to move because he hardly did at all. I was so good and did all of my "kick counts" just to make sure everything was alright in there. When he joined us in the outside world he was so mellow. As long as he was fed he was happy. He hardly ever cried. That has since changed, he fusses about things frequently now like having to go back to bed at 4 am. But despite his wiggling and occasional tantrum he is still a pretty mellow laid back kid for his age. He is a pleaser, I am trying to get him to stand up for himself. Just not when he is standing up to me.

Then came baby girl. While on the "inside" she parked herself right up by my ribs and kicked and kicked and kicked and then punched a little. I never felt like I could breathe. She too was on the large side but had a bit more space than the boy. I remember commenting to the husband that this is going to be one hyper active kid. She is. She is a sweetie and truly has gotten better with the hitting and sharing, but she is always on the move. Plus she is a bit of a drama queen. She was an awful baby who couldn't stand the car because she wasn't being held and moved around. Driving a mile was torture. She has never gone into a full on sprint to get away from me in the parking lot or at the mall like the other one has done, but she is an opinionated little thing who displays her drawings on the wall, just without paper.

If my theory hold any water and the fetal movement inside is a good prediction of baby behavior then the husband and I are in for a holy terror. This fetus is either small, which I seriously doubt given the ultrasound and my history of too large for my pelvis babies and has plenty of space to flip about, or he is going to need some Ritalin. He is always on the move. Thankfully not up in my ribs but my entire belly moves around when he squirms. Which is frequently. Oh sure he sleeps a little, but most of the time he is flipping from left to right, lays back to kick out his legs like he's on a recliner and then stretches his little arms out for good measure and wiggles fingers and toes. I am pretty sure he is sweating to oldies in there with Richard Simmons. Then come the hiccups. All of my kids got the hiccups frequently and as babies to, it always seemed to coincide with a growth spurt. This kid must be growing a lot. Unlike the boy's very predictable hiccup schedule, which was about 10 am every day, this kid's is about four times a day or naturally when I am relaxing. Like infants, fetuses totally understand the concept of "Mommy just sat it is time for some attention."

Friday, November 14, 2008

Picture of the week

Pregnant women waiting for birthing kits in Congo. If you would like to send a birth kit to a mom to be in Haiti, Rwanda, Malawai, or Lesotho click here for more information. $15 dollars provides three kits. I plan on purchasing some as my "push gift" or shall I say c-section gift. Because Lord knows I have been blessed. Thanks to for the photo. 

Thursday, November 13, 2008

I ain't saying she's a gold digger, but she likes marble when she works out.

While waddling on the treadmill at the brand spanking new gym today I saw something very scary. A New Kids on the Block Video on the great wall of televisions. So very strange. We joined this gym under the advice of the husband, apparently he likes to sweat in fancy places. This place is fancy. Only $20 more than what we were paying before so I'll take the fancy, plus we get child sitting for two kids instead of one for that price. There is even a salon in this place. Seems strange to me, but they looked pretty busy already so maybe its not so strange. The kid area is fantastic. Really big, climbing playground, mini sized basketball court, separate area for toddlers, another area for infants, plus a bunch of apple computers for the kids to play on. How well a place handles children is now my deciding factor on whether it is deemed Jennie-worthy or not. This place has passed the sniff test.

Yet, during my waddle session I was struck by how odd it is to see FM frequency labels underneath the pretty flat screen t.v. on the wall for your distracting enjoyment. When I first saw them I was confused. I looked at my ipod it shook its head and said nope can't do that, either can the iphone. There is no way to tune into the t.v.s unless you have a radio, like a walkman or something. No little device on the treadmill in which to plug into to so you can hear what you are watching. Can you even purchase these devices anymore? The husband said he was bring in a boom box on his shoulders and then plug the head phones into it. But honest to God, I must have stared at the iphone for a good thirty seconds pondering how to make it tune to a radio frequency. It made the brain hurt and I decided I would just listen to my music.

So dear new fancy gym,

Please join us in the tail end of 2008 and realize that most people listen to music with some sort of mp3 player and are in no way able to tune into to a FM frequency, your televisions are a mere annoyance. The rest of the gym sure is purdy.


Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Seven things in pictures, all scanned

I was tagged by the Clotheline for seven more random things about myself. Here they are in pictures

1. My favorite holiday is Christmas. (Isn't the Manny adorable??)

2. My first car on Christmas morning

3. I used to occasionally do this, now I take my son to do it.

4. I once swam with dolphins, I swam with manatees too but don't have a picture of them.

5. I was supposed to go here with the husband for Valentine's Day 2001 but we missed the bus...I cried.

6. This is my dog Maddy as a naughty three year old, she turns 10 on Friday and we are actually having a little party for the dumb mutt.

7. This is from the very first movie that the husband and I saw together. July 9, 1999. awwww.

I am tagging Welcome to the Circus for some random bits of information. I am sure she has plenty. 

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

To my love:

Happy Veteran's Day!

(and Happy V Day to all of those vets out there that I am not kissing too.)

Monday, November 10, 2008

just when you thought i was a socialist...jennie's expert thoughts on the state of the economy

I had to take a macroeconomics class in order to obtain my degree from the oh so prestigious UNLV, therefore I am completely qualified to discuss the state of the economy. I should be taken at face value and very important financial decisions should be made based on my expert opinions. That and the husband watches CNBC like it is his crack (or as I call it the ugly white man club channel) and some of it has possibly soaked in. 

This economy has now turned into, and I am coining a phrase here people take note, The Biggest Loser Economy.  This is where institutions such as the financial giants, insurance giant AIG (this one I just don't understand), and now the auto industry became so very fat and bloated and refused to look into a mirror. Didn't even bother asking does this dress make me look fat? Then the poor bastards had a heart attack and we (read: your tax dollars that should be funding infrastructure and that fun thing called schools) are now paying the fat bastards to lose weight so they don't go belly up on the ER table. Just like that very annoying show on NBC. Sorry to anyone out there reading this who just won lots of cash eating more than their fair share and then getting money because they lost the weight. I am a heartless bitch at times.  America wake up!!! I believe this is a systemic problem in our nation, everyone wanted new toys and wanted them RIGHT NOW so they ran up their credit card bills which is essentially what the financial institutions did as well, although the bank's credit card holders were We The People with very low credit scores and high credit card/HELOC debt which was held held by those same banks. cliche: endless cycle. 

Let's move on to the auto industry shall we? For years we have made large unsustainable cars and the poo finally hit the fan and now the industry is crying. Disclaimer: I have a large unsustainable car. So free market what should be do? Realize that there is a dwindling market for our inferior gas guzzling cars let the industry go belly up learn our lesson and innovate? No, don't like that capitalism? How's about we give them $25 billion one week and when that isn't enough we pump in another $50 billion. Sound better. Are there strings attached like: "um auto industry try making a sustainable product based on today's market's needs and not the roaring 90s and the I have my head in the sand 2000s. Thanks." No?  How about we just give some cash to shut you up then. I see your head nodding. Let me get my checkbook. 

Now I totally realize that these industries are filled with people with families who need to survive. But I seriously doubt that we are learning any sort of meaningful lesson by paying bloated people cash to lose weight. I don't agree with paying kids who get As either. Hard work is simply expected in my book and so is integrity. And you may ask yourself, what the hell got into her, a spastic fetus jumping around that won't let her sleep? I would reply yes. But also, there is a pink Hummer that lives around here. When gas prices were super high it disappeared and went into hiding, its parents either couldn't afford her food budget or were afraid that she would be maimed by all the Hummer haters. As soon as gas hit $2.50 good old pinky returned to the streets. I see her everywhere now. I see this Hummer as a symbol, let's put all of our financial responsibility to our children (not to mention the Earth) on the back burner and go shopping. Then after we have had one too many corn dogs from Hot Dog on a Stick at the food court and are now rather obese we can go running to someone and ask for a magic dollar to fix all of our problems. 

(I know this maybe a political blog which I thought I was done with, but at least I didn't mention any party names. I may lighten up by tomorrow. Just don't get me started on health care, where my thoughts are completely socialist.) 

Sunday, November 9, 2008

A new day

I am really digging this song right now. I know too many political blogs, this should be the least for a little while.

embedding has been disabled, please check out a new day on

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

if i had been able to drink a glass of champagne i am pretty sure it would have been the whole bottle

Whew that was long, but we have crossed the finish line. I don't think I have ever been more proud of being American. Yesterday seemed like the longest day ever. Both kids home and sick, while I was trying desperately to distract myself from the news. So we made a ballot box, printed out pictures of the candidates and held a Jennie household election. It went 3-1 Obama. The Jennie household went blue. The husband and I were not allowed to participate because we had already voted and voting twice is a big no-no. So both kids and the pets exercised their rights. Exit polling showed that both children voted for Obama, despite the boy campaigning for McCain for a good five minutes before voting, I made sure he adhered to the fifty foot electioneering border around the ballot box. Baby girl did later state she voted for herself but obviously that was just crazy post election punditry.  The dog voted for Obama as well, she being an enthusiastic voter grabbed the Obama picture in her mouth and ran with it to the box. She is German born and has some socialist leanings. She was born on an air base so she is an American citizen but her formative years were spent abroad. The cat, however, went for McCain. He simply sniffed the McCain picture and then went and took a nap. He was born on the streets and was rescued from a shelter in Las Vegas. He is a crotchety man with very strong capitalist leanings, plus is he is pretty pro-life given his meager start and adoption. The kids had fun and we stayed busy for a good hour. 

After the kids went to bed the husband and I watched the coverage and I, in my hormonal state, actually welled up when the news organizations called it for Obama. Not because "my guy" won, but because it was so historic and I felt so proud to be a part of this processes. I have such great hope in our nation. It just proves what hard work and personal determination can do. While watching McCain's concession speech I couldn't help but think that if he had conducted himself with the same grace he was showing last night during the campaign it would have been a lot harder decision for people. I was very impressed with his speech.  I was really surprised to actually know the President-elect before I went to bed. Amazing.  

But, I am very glad this season is over and our nation can actually begin to fix these enormous problems we are facing. And now, I would like to bid audieu to Mr. back tax owing, unlicensed, does not speak for me "real American" Joe the plumber, and say hello to Joe the Vice President. Oh, and I am the most proud of my Obama voting Republican Florida resident grandma.  

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

The pregnancy

I was planning on posting about the differences of my first pregnancy and my third. Or really my attitude towards the pregnancies. Such as, during the boy's go 'round I always knew what week and day I was at, I constantly was looking at pregnancy books, baby books, playing with all the baby accessories I had purchased, never had a drop of caffeine, never ate unpasteurized cheese, never took any medicine, and looked online constantly about anything pregnancy related. My second pregnancy with baby girl I had calmed down, I looked at the books maybe a couple of times, an occasional glance at the Internet, but I still never drank caffeine, or ate blue cheese, and always knew what week I was at. This go around is a bit different. A few weeks ago I started living dangerously and decided, what the hell, I am having some coffee. Granted it is only one half cup a day, but it is a necessity since resting is damn near impossible with the two kiddos running around, that and all the Chinese speaking I am doing at 5:30 in the morning. The other thing is the cheese. I simply began indulging in whatever cheese I wanted. Most of it being pasteurized, actually I am pretty sure all of it has been but I stopped checking the labels. I usually have no idea what week I am at, I was shocked while making my last appointment at the OBs to hear see you in two weeks. Two weeks?!? We are already at that point I asked? Yep, third trimester. I am in my third trimester? Holy Crap. Then I just felt the impending doom of c-section pain, sore nipples, no sleep, and changing 30 diapers a day. I immediately indulged in some Halloween candy. 

I have it pretty easy in the pregnancy department. I get REALLY sick at first but once that fun is over I am pretty much the same. I can't work out very well, but I still try. I take a nap every few days but other than some sciatica I always feel pretty good. Babies always move lots, labs are always normal, never have any high blood pressure. Blessed. Until yesterday...

I had a scare. There was some bleeding. Hardly anything but since I have NEVER had any bleeding in the other two pregnancies I kind of freaked out. After speaking with my doctor and denied all the important questions cramping, labor, baby not moving, I was told I needed to relax and hang out with my feet up the rest of the day. Preferably in bed. So I was on modified bedrest from 2 pm on  yesterday. Let me just say that it SUCKED!!!! I am completely incapable of hanging out in bed all day. Both kids were napping and then we all watched cartoons in bed together and then made a picnic on my bed for dinner. Mr. Worried Husband was not allowed by yours truly to come home early. Let's just say he gets a little too nervous for my taste when I am not 100% normal. The bleeding stopped as suddenly as it started. Obviously I am supposed to call and go in if it starts up again, but Holy Hell I cannot believe that women have to do that for weeks on end! They are some troopers. My mental health would be in the trash can after a few days. Plus, and this is really odd but true, all I could think about was thank God I voted early because if I were stuck at home tomorrow I would go insane. That and both kids are now sick so I am not sure how well voting would have gone today anyway. So needless to say that I had a wake up call from my body stating "hey lady you are not invincible, ask for help and rest or I will make you." So that is what I am trying really hard to do.

Oh, and vote for pete's sake if you haven't already!!!! People died so you could, don't take it for granted. 

Sunday, November 2, 2008

more fun with groceries

You may remember that I do NOT like grocery shopping with the husband. We always end up spending more money than I care to spend. However, for the second month in a row I let him come with me. Not to Costco, oh no no no. But to just the grocery store. Now that I think about it we did check out the new Sprouts store a couple weeks ago together. He picked out some steaks and didn't complain about the lack of food in the house all week. Just a couple of steaks was all it took. So I figure that every once in a while the man can accompany me to the store. He absolutely loves it so, while I HATE it. Loathe it. I Simply do it because we need food. So we can get down to a few dried out tortillas and a shrivled grapefruit and I am cool with it.  The kids do not starve. I promise. Plus, we get our milk delivered so every Monday morning I know that we will have milk. The husband, on the other hand, I think measures our life's successes on how well the pantry is stocked. Plus he prefers that it look like a store shelf, while I have spatial issues. I find organizing spaces really hard. Clean house, very messy closets. So when I shop, come home and unload I tend to just shove the new food in with very little rhyme or reason. Don't look in the back of the fridge, things may have grown appendages. 

But seeing as how I am getting larger by the minute and taking the kids with me to go horrible grocery shopping sounds like torture, the husband was included on Saturday. Did we spend more money. Yep, sure did. Will he actually take his lunch to work with him instead of going out. I seriously doubt it. But, he won't whine or complain about the lack of snacks for a least a week. We will actually have more food to cook, I will say that. When he comes with us I let him take over the whole shopping experience as well, he gets to push baby girl around and picks out the food. While I wander around day dreaming of white sand beaches and mai tais, there may have been a pool boy involved, I can't say for sure. The biggest benefit of having Mr. Man join us is displayed below. He organized and put all the groceries away, even wiped out the fridge and disposed of any multi colored unrecognizable food like substances. I rewarded the effort with cookies. Plus, I only made five comments about the amount spent as opposed to the usually 50. Having the dear man shop with us may be something that I welcome more often. It costs extra, but it certainly helps my sanity. 

Oh and the boy very loudly stated "Hey Mommy look at that fat family," while we were checking out. Nice.